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Blonde Redhead Brunette Fun Naughty Laugh Jokes
Bull for Ranch
Two sisters, one blonde and one brunette, inherit the family ranch.
Unfortunately, after just a few years, they are in financial trouble. In order to keep the bank from repossessing the ranch, they need to purchase a bull so that they can breed their own stock.
Upon leaving, the brunette tells her sister, "When I get there, if I decide to buy the bull, I’ll contact you to drive out after me and haul it home."
The brunette arrives at the man’s ranch, inspects the bull, and decides she wants to buy it.
The man tells her that he will sell it for $599, no Less.
After paying him, she drives to the nearest town to send her sister a telegram to tell her the news.
She walks into the telegraph Office, and says, "I want to send a telegram to my sister telling her that I’ve bought a bull for our ranch. I need her to hitch the trailer to our pickup truck and drive out here so we can haul it home."
The telegraph operator explains that it will cost 99 cents a word.
Well, after paying for the bull, the brunette realises that she’ll only be able to send her sister one word.
After a few minutes of thinking, she nods and says, "I want you to send her the word "comfortable."
The operator shakes his head, "How is she ever going to know that you want her to hitch the trailer to your pickup truck and drive out here to haul that bull back to your ranch if you send her just the word "comfortable?"
The brunette explains, "My sister’s blonde.
The word is big.
She’ll read it very slowly…
"Com-for-DA-bul."

Submitted by Daisy (), Toons Land


Charity
A blonde, brunette, and redhead went to a church to donate money.
The brunette draws a circle around her and throws up all her money. She says that whatever lands inside the circle is for God, and whatever lands outside of the circle she keeps.
The redhead then draws a line, stands on it, and throws up all of her money. She said that whatever lands on the right side of the line is for God, and whatever lands on the left side she keeps.
The blonde throws up her money, and yells,"God, whatever you catch is yours, and whatever you don't I get to keep."

Submitted by Samuel L Jackson (), Hollywood

TOILET PAPER
A blonde, a brunette and a redhead were walking along the beach. A seagull flies over and craps all over the blonde.
The brunette says in a disgusted voice, "Hang on the bathroom is just up the hill, I'll go get some toilet paper."
After she leaves the blonde begins to laugh.
The redhead says, "What's so funny?"
The blonde says, "Well, blondes are supposed to be so dumb and look at her! By the time she gets back with that toilet paper that seagull will be miles away!"

Submitted by Sammy Braddy (19), London

Island Natives!!
A brunette, a redhead and a blonde explore Native Island. They get attacked by Natives. The Natives say, "We need your skin to make our boats, so either we kill you, or you can kill yourselves with honour." The girls of course chose to kill themselves with honour, so the Natives show them a plate of weapons.
The brunette takes a knife, "I just want every one of you to know that I love my boyfriend very much." And she falls dead.
The redhead takes a dagger, "I just want every one one of you to know that I was about to graduate." And she falls dead.
The blonde goes to the dinner table and takes a fork. She stabs herself all over once, "I just want everyone to know that your boat is going to leak!"

Submitted by Robert Vida Guerra (20), Pennysylvania

Define Blonde!
What's the true definition of a blonde?
Redhead with the fire of passion missing.

Joke Submitted by Sylvia Marshal Saint (), Newfoundland, Australia

Frosted Flakes
A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, "Please come over here and help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get it started."
Her boyfriend asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?"
The blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a tiger."
Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle. She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table.
He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says, "First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a tiger." He takes her hand and says, "Second, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice cup of tea, and then....." he sighed, "...let's put all these Frosted Flakes back in the box."

Submitted by Konifur (31), USA

Christmas Tree
There were two blondes, who went deep into the woods, searching for a Christmas tree.
After hours of subzero temperature and a few close calls with hungry Wolves, one blonde turned to the other and said, "I'm chopping down the next tree I see. I don't care whether it's decorated or not!"

Submitted by Mark Hogan (28), Utaha

Blonde Cop!
A Blonde gets pulled over by a Blonde Police officer.
A blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little red sports car and was pulled over by a woman police officer who was also a blonde.
The blonde cop asked to see the blonde driver's license. She dug through her purse and was getting progressively more agitated.
"What does it look like?" she finally asked.
The policewoman replied, "It's square and it has your picture on it."
The driver finally found a square mirror in her purse, looked at it and handed it to the policewoman.
"Here it is," she said.
The blonde officer looked at the mirror, then handed it back saying, "Okay, you can go. I didn't realize you were a cop."

Submitted by Katy Perry (17),

Redneck Joke
A guy in a bar leans over to the guy next to him and says, "Wanna hear a "redneck" joke?"
The guy next to him replies, "Before you tell that joke you should know something. I'm 6' tall, 200 lbs. and a redneck. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2", 225 lbs. and a redneck. The fella next to him is 6'5", 250 lbs. and a redneck. Do you still want to tell that joke?"
The first guy says, "Nah. I don't want to have to explain it three times."

Submitted by Ben Kingsley (), Bullsville

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