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A Bit Of Irish Humor
A drunk staggers into a Catholic Church, enters a confessional booth,
sits down, but says nothing.
The Priest coughs a few times to get his attention but the drunk just sits there.
Finally, the Priest pounds three times on the wall.
The drunk mumbles, "Ain't no use knockin, there's no paper on this side either."
Submitted by famouswba (),
Four Irish Men
There's these four Irishmen in a bar, all drinking Guinness. One of them is looking rather puzzled, so another turns to him and asks him what's the matter.
1st Irishman: Well, I was just trying to remember what 2 plus 2 is.
2nd Irishman: Oh, that's easy, it's 147.
1st Irishman: No no no, that can't be right. How about you, Fergus, do you know what 2 plus 2 is?
3rd Irishman: Hmmm ... could it be Wednesday, perhaps?
1st Irishman: No no no, that doesn't sound right either. How about you Pat, do you know?
4th Irishman: Simple, the answer is 4.
1st Irishman: Of course! How did you work it out?!
4th Irishman: Aha, that's where brains come in! I subtracted 147 from Wednesday!
Submitted by Aliyah Carey (21), NY
Irish Tradition!
An Irish man walks into a pub. The bartender asks him, "What'll you have?"
The man says, "Give me three pints of Guiness please."
So the bartender brings him three pints and the man proceeds to alternatiely sip one, then the other, then the third until they're gone.
He then orders three more.
The bartender says, "Sir, I know you like them cold. You don't have to order three at a time. I can keep an eye on it and will bring you a fresh cold one, when you get low."
The man says, "You don't nderstand. I have two brothers, one in Australia and one in the States. We made a vow to each other that every Saturday night we'd still drink together. So right now, my brothers have three Guinness Stouts too, and we're drinking together.
The bartender thought that was a wonderful tradition. Every week the man came in and ordered three beers.
Then one week he came in and ordered only two. He drank them and then ordered two more.
The bartender said, "I know what your tradition is, and I'd just like to say that I'm sorry that one of your brothers died."
The man said, "Oh, me brothers are fine - I just quit drinking."
Submitted by Fiery Angel (17), Femme
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