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MODERN MEDICINE
Five surgeons are discussing who makes the best patients to operate on.
The first surgeon says, "I like to see accountants on my operating table, because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered."
The second responds, "yeah, but you should try electricians! Everything inside them is color-coded."
The third surgeon says, "no, I really think librarians are the best; everything inside them is in alphabetical order."
The fourth surgeon chimes in, "you know, I like construction workers...those guys always understand when you have a few parts left over at the end, and when the job takes longer than you said it would."
But the fifth surgeon shut them all up when he observed, "you're all wrong. Politicians are the easiest to operate on. There's no guts, no heart, and no spine, and the head and rear are interchangeable."
Submitted by Rodney
Probability of Success
A doctor attending a patient.
Patient: Doctor I want to undergo a 'by-pass surgery',what is the probability of success?
Doctor: 100%!!
Patient: But how can you be so sure of acheiving 100% success?
Doctor: On the day of Convocation, my prof. told me that when you practise medicine chances of failure will be 99% and success 1%.
I have already attended 99 patients(failed to cure them) and you are the 100th!!
Submitted by Jessica Alba (27), Indianapolis
Surgeon’s After Work
A well respected surgeon was relaxing on his sofa one evening just after arriving home from work.
As he was tuning into the evening news, the phone rang. The doctor calmly answered it and heard the familiar voice of a colleague on the other end of the line.
"We need a fourth for poker," said the friend. "I'll be right over," whispered the doctor.
As he was putting on his coat, his wife asked, "Is it serious?"
"Oh yes, quite serious," said the doctor gravely. "In fact, three doctors are there already!"
Submitted by Dr. U K Singh
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