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Stat on Iraq vs. DC (political humor?)
If you consider that there have been an average of 160,000 troops in the Iraq theater of operations during the last 22 months, and a total
of 2112 deaths, that gives a firearm death rate of 60 per 100,000.
The rate in Washington D.C. is 80.6 per 100,000. That means that you are about 25% more likely to be shot and killed in our Nation's Capitol, which
has some of the strictest gun control laws in the nation, than you are in Iraq.
Conclusion: We should immediately pull out of Washington D.C.!!
Submitted by Thelly Reahm (),
Democrat Studs!
Q: What do Democrats and porn studs have in common?
A: Both participate frequently in bush bashing!
Submitted by Mike (), AOL USA
Bush Leadership Test
While visiting England, George Bush is invited to tea with the Queen. He asks her what her leadership philosophy is. She says that it is to surround herself with intelligent people.
Bush asks how she knows if they're intelligent.
"I do so by asking them the right questions," says the Queen. "Allow me to demonstrate."
Bush watches as the Queen phones Tony Blair and says, "Mr. Prime Minister, please answer this question: your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or sister. Who is it?"
Tony Blair responds, "It's me, ma'am."
"Correct. Thank you and good-bye, sir," says the Queen. She hangs up and says, "Did you get that, Mr. Bush?"
Bush nods: "Yes ma'am. Thanks a lot. I'll definitely be using that!"
Bush, upon returning to Washington, decides he'd better put the Chairman of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee to the test. Bush summons Dick Lugar to the White House and says, "Senator Lugar, I wonder if you can answer a question for me."
"Why, of course, sir. What's on your mind?"
Bush poses the question: "Uhh, your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or your sister. Who is it?"
Lugar hems and haws and finally asks, "Can I think about it and get back to you?"
Bush agrees, and Lugar leaves. He immediately calls a meeting of other senior Republican senators, and they puzzle over the question for several hours, but nobody can come up with an answer. Finally, in desperation, Lugar calls Rice at the State Department and explains his problem.
"Now lookee here, your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or your sister. Who is it?"
Rice answers immediately, "It's me, of course."
Much relieved, Lugar rushes back to the White House, finds George Bush, and exclaims, "I know the answer, sir! I know who it is! It's Condoleezza Rice!"
And Bush replies in disgust, "Wrong, you dumb shit, it's Tony Blair!"
Submitted by Desiya (28), Washington D.C.
Republican and Democrat
REPUBLICAN VIRUS:
Sells off your system resources to the highest bidder.
DEMOCRAT VIRUS:
Doesn't allow you to delete inefficient programs or wasted disc space - if you try, it accuses you of being a 'mean-spirited extremist'.
Submitted by Susan Enrique (19),
Quotations from Politicians
'When you're talking to me, keep your mouth shut.'
'Let's do this in one foul swoop.'
'I want to thank each and every one of you for having extinguished yourselves in this session.'
'We'll run it up the flagpole and see who salutes that booger.'
'I would like to take this time to reirritate my remarks.'
'The average age of a 7 year old in this state is 13.'
'I hate to confuse myself with the facts.'
'We have a permanent plan for the time being.'
'Family planning has many misconceptions.'
'My knowledge is no match for his ignorance.'
Submitted by Dvenky (),
America's Dysfunctional Presidential Past
WASHINGTON (Wireless Flash) -- Here's one reason to celebrate this President's Day (Feb. 21): Chances are, you're not nearly as dysfunctional as some of America's presidents.
Family counselor Beverly Hubble Tauke says Americans may be surprised to learn that some of the country's remarkable presidents had their share of grim family pain.
Tauke says Ronald Reagan's father was an alcoholic, while Bill Clinton never knew his father and was later traumatized by an alcoholic, wife-battering stepfather.
Abraham Lincoln is her favorite because his father was an impoverished illiterate who used to beat Abe for being ambitious and trying to learn to read, but "The Great Emancipator" still managed to prevail.
Despite the suffering, Tauke says these future presidents were able to succeed because they all had staunch allies on their side -- usually their mother or stepmother -- and they didn't allow themselves to think they were victims.
Submitted by Georgie (23),
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