Monday, June 21

Dad for Life

No recall vote for Impeachment, 
Father's constitution is written for Life (with help from mother) 
;-)

Saturday, June 19

Friday, June 18

New Boyfriend's Jet

My Ex was over the cloud with the new Man in her life.
"He said he had a Private Jet"

Tuesday, June 15

Ecstasy

Back and forth. . . in and out. . .in and out . . .a little to the right. . . a little to the left . . . she could feel the sweat on her forehead . . . between her breasts. . .
and, trickling down the small of her back. . . she was getting near to the end.

He was in ecstasy. . .
with a huge smile on his face as his wife moved. . .
forwards then backwards. . .
forward then backward. . .
again. . .
and again. . .
her heart was pounding now. . .
her face was flushed . . .
she moaned softly at first, then began to groan louder . . .
finally . . .
totally exhausted . . .
she let out a piercing scream . . . . .

"OK, OK, you smug bastard, I can't parallel park.  You do it!"

Thursday, June 10

Suez Canal Navigator

The Captain driving on road back from Suez Canal ship duty.

Monday, June 7

Wednesday, May 26

ID ten T Error

As we oldies know, sometimes we have  trouble with our computers. 

Yesterday, I had a problem, so I called Raaju, the 11 year old next door, whose bedroom looks like Mission Control, and asked him to come over.

Raaju clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem.

As he was walking away, I called after him, 'So, what was wrong?

He replied, 'It was an ID ten T error.' 

I didn't want to appear stupid, but nonetheless inquired, 'An, ID ten T error? What's that? In case I need to fix it again.'

Raaju grinned, 'Haven't you ever heard of an ID ten T error before?' 

'No,' I replied. 

'Write it down,' he said, 'and I think you'll figure it out.'

So I wrote down:
ID10T

 I used to like Raaju, but 
 not anymore.🤔😁

Thursday, May 20

News Headlines

A little girl was leaning into a lion's cage. Suddenly, the lion grabs her by the collar of her jacket and tries to pull her inside, all under the eyes of her screaming parents:

A biker jumps off his *Harley*, runs to the cage and hits the lion square on the nose with a powerful punch.

Whimpering from the pain, the lion jumps back, letting go of the girl, and the biker brings the girl to her terrified parents, who thank him endlessly.

A BBC reporter, Laura Kuenssberg, had watched the whole event.

Laura, addressing the Harley rider says. "Sir, this was the most gallant and bravest thing I've seen a man do in my whole life."

The Harley rider replies. "Why, it was nothing, really. The lion was behind bars. I just saw this little kid in danger, and acted as I felt right."

Miss Kuenssberg. "Well, I'll make sure this won't go unnoticed. I'm a BBC journalist, you know and tomorrow's News will run this story. So, what do you do for a living, and what political affiliation do you have?"

 The biker replies. "I'm a British Army veteran, a Conservative and I voted for Brexit."

The journalist leaves.

The following morning the biker turns on BBC News to see if it indeed brings news of his actions.
 
*BBC Headline*: RIGHT-WING UK VETERAN ASSAULTS AFRICAN IMMIGRANT AND STEALS HIS LUNCH.

And THAT pretty much sums up the BBC's approach to the news especially  on India these days... *And that of most of Indian media*

Friday, May 7

How Does That Even Happen!

This guy was trying to head out of the city, but apparently he was meant to stay in Vegas, at least for a little bit longer than planned. 
How does this even happen? 
He's lucky that he's still alive.

Wednesday, May 5

Stuff You May Like

Seniors' Daily Humor