Funny Brazilian football
Thursday, July 1
Wednesday, June 30
Sunday, June 27
Vagaries of English Language! Enjoy!!!😀😀😀
- Wonder why the word funeral starts with FUN?
-Why isn't a Fireman called a Water-man?
- How come Lipstick doesn't do what it says?
- If money doesn't grow on trees, how come Banks have Branches?
- If a Vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a Humanitarian eat?
- How do you get off a non-stop Flight?
- Why are goods sent by ship called CARGO and those sent by truck SHIPMENT?
- Why do we put cups in the dishwasher and the dishes in the Cupboard?
- Why do doctors 'practice' medicine? Are they having practice at the cost of the patients?
- Why is it called 'Rush Hour' when traffic moves at its slowest then?
- How come Noses run and Feet smell?
- Why do they call it a TV 'set' when there is only one?
- What are you vacating when you go on a vacation?
We can never find the answers, can we?
So just enjoy the pun and fun of the English language!!
Friday, June 25
I asked my friend's son what he wanted to be when he grows up. He said he wanted to be Prime Minister some day.
Both of his parents, LIBERAL LEFTISTS, were standing there, so I asked him, 'If you were Prime Minister, what would be the first thing you would do?'
He replied, 'I'd give food and houses to all the homeless people.' His parents beamed with pride.
'Wow...what a worthy goal.' I told him. 'But you don't have to wait until you're Prime Minister to do that. You can come over to my house and mow the lawn, pull weeds, and sweep my yard, and I'll pay you Rs.500. Then I'll take you over to the grocery store where the homeless guy hangs out, and you can give him the same 500 rupee note for food and new set of clothes .'
He thought that over for a few seconds, then he looked me straight in the eyes and asked, ' Why doesn't the homeless guy come over and do the work, and you can just pay him Rs.500?'
I said, 'Welcome to the RIGHTIST fold.'
His parents still aren't speaking to me.
Dedicated to all those who think distributing freebies is kindness.
Tuesday, June 22
A gynecologist waits on his last patient, who does not arrive.
After an hour, he makes a gin and tonic to relax. After he settles into an armchair to read the newspaper, he hears the doorbell ring.
It's the patient, who arrives all embarrassed and apologizes for the delay.
"It doesn't matter," answers the doctor. "Look, I was having a gin and tonic while waiting. Do you want one to help you relax?"
"I accept, thanks!" She answers.
He gives her a drink, sits down in front of her and they start talking. Suddenly someone is heard opening the entrance office door.
The doctor looks worried, gets up and says:
"My wife! Quick, take off your clothes and spread your legs, otherwise she might think there is some nonsense going on!"
Monday, June 21
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